Last week I was given a challenge in a Facebook Community I am in called BARE Daily run by Susan Hyatt (for more information on this program go to www.shyatt.com/baredaily/). The challenge was to do what’s called a “mind detox”. What is a mind detox?, you ask. A mind detox is a process of thought catching, noticing what you are thinking about yourself throughout your day. So, I did this challenge for an entire day and wrote down what I was thinking every hour or so. One of the most repetitive thoughts I had was, “I don’t have enough time”, there were others too, but this one kept coming up. Even though I am a coach myself and I coach myself all the time, this thought has plagued me for a while and I’ve always thought that I just need to make time for it, that if it is that important to me, that I will make time for it. Well, what do you know; I never make time for it, because the more I think about it, the more it stresses me out and instead of acting, I do nothing, paralyzed by my thoughts. Have you ever had this happen to you, where the more you think about something the more it stresses you out? I’ve spent a lot of time doing this lol!
I took my problem to the BARE group and a coach by the name of Dani Spies (https://cleananddelicious.com/) coached me on my thought of I don’t have enough time. She encouraged me to add at the end of my thought…And that is okay and to say it out loud. I don’t have enough time right now and that is okay. Try saying it out loud and see what happens. I said it out loud and what I felt was a huge relief. I don’t have enough time and that is okay. What a big perspective change that happened on my part. I realized that I needed to be okay with that and not push myself so damn hard. She then challenged me to think about what I would do if I did have time and when. It took me a little bit to answer this question for myself, but I began to realize that I can fit some exercise and time for myself in tiny increments. Just in the past couple days, I have added in 10/15 minutes of exercise, business building, and time for myself.
As a mom, I think about not having enough time a lot and I’m sure many other moms do as well. We push and push ourselves to find time for everything. To find time to eat healthy, exercise, spend time with our children, spend time with our partners, spend time with ourselves and everything else as well. We need to learn to reframe this thought to say, I don’t have enough time for (insert thing you don’t have time for) and that is okay. We spread ourselves too thin sometimes and then we don’t take any action at all and we feel like we are failing as parents and humans. Our society and culture place so many expectations on us and we think that if we don’t live up to them, we are somehow a failure as mom and that is so not true. Saying to ourselves, I don’t have enough time and that’s okay frees up the space in our mind to be more productive. In the past week, I have gone to bed earlier, spent 45 minutes doing yoga and not feeling bad about it, spent time doing this blog and other things too. What a difference this one phrase has made in my life in just one week.
If you want to talk more with me about this, you can visit the link here and schedule a 30-minute mini session.